Fourteen Years

Fourteen years ago today, Susan and I had a day off together, it was a Thursday. We got up early, packed up the kids into the Sprint and went on a road trip up island, to Qualicum Beach. It was there that we had an appointment with a Justice of the Peace and were married. I'd made all of the arrangements the two previous days, after I'd asked her to marry me of course. We knew a couple who lived up there, so we contacted them to be our witnesses. We stopped in Nanaimo on the way up to buy Susan a dress and some flowers.

During the ceremony, which was at the JoP's house, Eric and Kyle stayed in the foyer, not quite sure about what was going on, and why they had to get up so early.

After the ceremony, we went to the beach to take some pictures and then for a late lunch at a pizza shop. We both had to work the next day, so back to Victoria we travelled, stopping a couple of times to tell our parents what we'd done.

It was such a happy day and one that I'll remember for the rest of my life. It was the beginning of our life journey and I wouldn't have changed a thing. Now, fourteen years later, we've never been happier. We made a choice that we were going to stay together no matter what happened. It's not been perfect and we've had some bumps and hiccups along the way but it's been the best fourteen years of my life and I wouldn't trade it for anything. The trials and challenges are what makes us stronger and teaches us what to do next time something similar arrises. We are committed to each other and to our lives together, so I'd say we have the perfect marriage. I am blessed to have such a wonderful wife and cherish every moment I have with her. The kids are a lot older now and we've started dating, something which we never could do when they were young. Maybe we did things a little backwards from what people normally do, but what is normal. We are not a normal couple and people still comment on how we always do things together, like we were a new couple. We are there for each other. We live for each other. We are soul-mates. We enjoy being together and doing things for each other. We love each other unconditionally and each of us knows the other and things we do not know, we love to discover. We are a living extention of each other. We share pain and pleasure, we participate in each other's lives and are one within the life we have built together.

I love you Susan. Thank you for agreeing to be my wife. You complete me!

Writing a Story

I had a dream the other night after watching a zombie movie. Actually, it was not so much a dream, rather a subconcious construction of a story. I finished writing the story after about a week of writing down ideas to incorperate into it. The end product ended up pretty good I think.

It's funny how that happens. I get an idea or a thought and I build on it in my mind and a little bit on paper until I can actually sit down and write the story. I have done this with quite a few so far and I find it very satisfying. I don't know whether I'll be able to sell it or not but it's fun to do and I'm happy with it.

Autumn

Yesterday I noticed the first of the Autumn leaves scattered on the ground. It reminded me that Summer is only here for a few more days and before we know it, the trees will be bare and the ground will be covered.

Autumn is my favourite season. The leaves on the trees turn golden. The air is crisp and clean and cooler, but not cold. The pumpkins are almost ready. The animals are all so busy getting ready for Winter. It also means our wedding anniversary is coming up, my birthday is close and Christmas is right around the corner.

When I go outside, I can smell Autumn in the breeze. To me it smells better than every other season and I love it. It is most distinct; fresh. The rains also come, along with the wind, washing away the dust and heat of the Summer, cleansing the earth.

Autumn is also about Thanksgiving and Halloween. Big turkey dinners, pumpkin pie and spending time with family. It's about fun. Getting rid of the old, shedding our skin, preparing for rebirth; new life, new beginning, a fresh start.

To me, Autumn is the beginning of a new year.

Laura's Mask

I had to post a few of the pictures Laura took of herself in her new mask. She says when she's wearing it, "I feel like a Super Hero." She's so cute!

The Pictures I Promised

Sunday Market

Today Laura and I dropped Susan off at work at 12:30, parked downtown and walked down to the Sunday Market on Government Street. It is one of the last market weekends of the year.

There were not as many stands today as there has been in previous weeks. That was okay though because it was still fun. We bought Susan a package of her favorite pumpkin seed cookies which we do every week. It's a good thing that that stand was still there.

As we were wandering through the market, we noticed that something was happening in China Town so we went over to take a look. A large group of people in blue shirts were gathering on the street and there were large drums and two dragons on the road. They were preparing for a dance and Kung Fu demonstration to honour the Chinese Freemason Association.

It was loud once the drums started but beautiful to see the Dragons dancing. We watched for a few minutes but they started dancing up the street so we continued with our market browsing.

Every week when we go to the market, we see a vendor selling Venetian masquerade masks. They are beautiful. Laura always tries them on when we stop there. Today she decided to buy one. It is purple and shaped sort of like a butterfly, a magnificent work of art. She wore it for the car ride home which was very cute.

After Laura had made her purchase, we left the market and started walking back to the car. We stopped in at a used book store and I found one of Clive Barker's Books of Blood which I had to buy. Then we went up to the British candy shop to buy Susan some of her favorite jelly babies.

We decided that because we were parked only a block and a half from where Susan was working that we would walk up and surprise her with her treats. She seemed very happy to see us although she was right in the middle of something so she couldn't stop and have a break with us.

After we left Starbucks, we stopped in at a Mac computer store which was right next door. They had a lot of neat things in there. Once we were done browsing that shop, we finally walked to the car and drove home. I had such a good day with my little girl. I hope that she did too.

Butchart Garden

Today, Susan and I went to Butchart Gardens. What a beautiful place. Everything is so perfectly pruned and cultivated. I can't even imagine the man hours it takes every day to keep up with it.

The other thing I couldn't believe was how many people were there. We arrived just before eleven and the entrance to the garden was just packed with people. By the time we left, the parking lot was half full and most of the cars were not from BC.

We made our way around the garden taking lots of pictures, which I'll post a little later. The sunken garden is beautiful. There is a fountain at the edge of it which sprays water in the air in all different directions creating an amazing effect. The other part I really liked was the Japanese Garden. I loved all the bonsai style trees.

I wish we could have had a chance to see the fireworks, they are supposed to be spectacular. Next year for sure.

After we left the gardens, we went downtown to the fisherman's wharf to have some fish and chips at Barbs. It was so tasty. We drove down to Dallas Road to eat our lunch.

After we got home, Laura wanted to go to her cousin's house for the night so we drove back out to Saanich to drop her off. We came back home and had a little nap, waking up hungry a little while later so we decided to go out for dinner. There is a little Thai restaurant in Esquimalt called Zap which we'd never been to but heard great things about. Our oldest son also started working there recently so we thought we'd give it a try. Dinner was delicious! We were very happy with our choice.

What a beautiful day. I am so lucky to have such a wonderful wife to spend time with. Susan is the greatest! It is so nice to be able to have a "date" day like this every once in a while.

Tragedy

Again I come across another example of the value of life and how we should live in the moment rather than worrying about the past or fretting over the future, both of which we have no control over.

There is a family who lives in our co-op, whose two of their three children were in a car accident. The boy, who is nineteen was driving and the girl, twenty was the passenger. He ran a stop sign and was hit by another car. His sister died.

That is the end of it for her. Nothing more to happen in her life. No college, no more birthdays, no more Christmas's, no wedding, no children; end. Nothing more to look forward to but memories in the hearts and minds of her loved ones. All hopes and dreams shattered with one split second of inattention.

Who can honestly say that they've never accidentally run through a stop sign, or done something while driving which could have an unfortunate result. We consider ourselves lucky and continue on our way, maybe slowing down or paying more attention and thanking our luck stars.

How terrible for that boy who will, for the rest of his life, have to live with the fact that his sister died in a car accident while he was at the wheel. He will probably never get over it and his life will forever be changed. The outcome could have very easily been different, had he been seconds faster or slower, and life would have gone on for his sister and his life and the lives of his family would have not been irreversibly changed.

Life is a crap shoot and we never know what's going to happen. If you believe in fate, then it is destined to happen and maybe someone else would have run a stop sign and hit their car, killing the girl. If you believe in God, then He already knew that it was going to happen and how, even though we have free will. If you believe in the afterlife, then she's in a better place. If you believe in reincarnation, then she's already being born into another life.

The trouble is, we don't really know and we are just forced to accept whatever we believe, in hopes that it will help us in our own life, whether by lesson or realization, revelation or cognizance. We are bound in ignorance by our upbringing and later in life, by our experience and decisions which either reinforce or cripple that belief. In effect, we don't really know anything or why anything happens and are bound only by the limits of our imagination when it really comes down to it. And in our seemingly senseless wanderings, are shocked and dismayed when a tragedy such as this occurs, making us think again, how fragile life is and how very little we know about it.

So now I will hug my wife and I will hug my children and tell them all that I love them. They are my life and I want to spend as much quality time with them as our life will permit, and I will be thankful for that time. I will cherish the memories of that time and it will blend into the present, as time goes on, to strengthen our ties and create lasting relationship which will extend beyond the grave.

We are small and insignificant in the broad aspect of the world but important beyond comprehension to those who love us and are close to our hearts. Life is unexpected, both in its beginning and its end. We are merely a heartbeat in the extent of time; how will we leave our mark?

Summer of Fun

We had such a good Summer but it went by so fast and so much has happened during that time. It seems that the busier we are, the faster the time flies by.

Susan has a new job, I changed my position, Laura quit hers, Eric got one and Kyle thought about it for a little while. On top of that, the child support order has been terminated which gives us a good chunk more money every month and that is very good.

We went camping, we took a road trip to Penticton, we went to the Saanich Fair. All of that we did as a family except for the camping which was just me and Laura. The rest was all of us and it was so good to be doing things as a family.

We watched some movies, bought some new plants, BBQ'd a lot and did lots of shopping in markets on Sundays. More recently we did the big back to school shop which is always fun, no really.

We tried new foods: squash and curry; not together. Everyone is loving the curry dinners! I'm glad that Susan finally tried cooking curry because it is so good and nice for a change. She's such a good cook.

Now Kyle and Laura are back in school and Laura is back in dance class -- she's taking Hip-Hop this year, and is so excited.

We're also thinking about getting a dog which will be fun. It's been a while since our last pet died and it's time we added a furry addition to our family.

All in all, life just keeps getting better as it goes along and I'm enjoying every second of it. I can't wait to see what's going to happen next. Life is good and Susan and I have never been happier coming up on our fourteenth wedding anniversary if you can believe that!

I think that I've discovered that the key to happiness is to enjoy and be thankful for every second of life that I've been given and to live in the now rather than the past or worrying about the future because now is the only thing that matters.